Friday, September 24, 2010

Floss This

I don’t floss.

And, no matter how many dental hygienists glare at me from behind their little, baby-blue, paper masks, which undoubtedly hide scowls of disgust, will I ever change my ways. My position on flossing is nothing new, not a New Year’s resolution, nor an epiphany. For as long as I can remember I have harbored discontent towards flossing and would go as far to say that I am a staunch supporter of the underground, anti-flossing movement. In my opinion, it takes a special individual with an interest in self- mutilation, to want to wake up and cram a minty piece of string into the crevasses of their teeth. Often, these individuals are shocked when their gums respond by bleeding. Then, these individuals reason that “I must not be flossing enough!” No my friends, you aren’t flossing enough. In fact, I can tell by your charming, blood-stained, smile that you need to step up your flossing to three times a day. Even better, your dentist recommends that you trade in your floss for a used shoe-lace; that will surely make your pearly-whites more attractive. So, to all you anxious, gap-toothed, floss wielding masses of the world- while you are busy shunning me for my lack of concern towards dental hygiene I am out buying Skittles and Pixy Sticks for your children to binge on. Happy Halloween. Suckers.


Thursday, September 9, 2010

Forget Snowboarding- Sell Your soul to Corporate America!


As snowboarding reaches a new peak in the mountain range that is popularity, we find ourselves in a position to buy into giant, name brand, super-companies (like Nike, and The North Face) swooping in from their sky scrappers to sell you the newest best thing since sliced bread; or, we can stick with companies that actually have been with snowboarding from an early time. Companies like Ride, and even Burton were with snowboarding before the dollar signs started to appear. Even companies like Arbor and Airblaster actually promote having responsible fun and actually promote something other than themselves (Arbor promoting eco responsible snowboard manufacturing and Airblaster promoting having fun and being goofy, not just looking like everyone else)

Granted super-companies like Nike can dump a ton of money into the development of just one boot thus pushing the limit as to what a snowboard boot could be. North Face can make a killer jacket with the years of outerwear manufacturing experience. BUT, is it really worth choking out the companies that were here from the start?